I recently had the following series of e-mails from an EBay member about a printer I had listed for sale. Now, when I list something, my starting price is usually the minimum price at which I feel it is worthwhile (profitable) for me to sell at. Usually, I try to find bargains so that I can undersell most of the competition and, I must say, I’m pretty good at it.

There are several interesting things about how this person approaches doing business with me. First, he assumes I’ll jump at the chance to sell at a loss. Frankly, for me to sell this particular printer at the price he is willing to pay is absurd. I’d rather just keep the printer for myself or donate it to a worthwhile cause than sell it for such a low amount.

Second, he argues that he can order the printer directly from Epson for $90. If he was the successful bidder, he would have received the exact same printer with the exact same warranty for about $65. Well, I guess he showed me!

Third, he seems to want to ignore the entire bidding process by having me sell to him before the auction ends and he wants to dictate the terms of the sale. As I mentioned in my response, I highly doubt the he would try anything like this with a B&M establishment. Could you image walking into any store and telling the clerk that you will only pay 75% of the asking price of an item? I doubt this would go over very well and am confused as to why someone would think this is acceptable in an on line auction.

Anyway, here is the text of our exchange. I have not altered it in any way.

Customer: i offer you $49.99 shipped to miami ground with tracking

My Reply: Shipping to Miami would run about $15.00. So, in essence, you are asking if I'll sell a $100 printer for $35.00.

Customer: 89.99 epson.com with warranty i offer you $50 shipped now let me know bed time

My Reply: Mine is also brand new in sealed box with warranty.

Customer: so? u take my offer? also i can buy LCD monitors used or new

My Reply: No. I want at least $49.95 + shipping. I need to make a living. If I can't sell it for that, I'd just as soon send it back to my distributor.

Customer: u lose the deal for $14 dollars?

My Reply: I can ask you the same question. I find it insulting that you would try to beat me up on what I consider a more than fair price. I calculate my starting price based upon a reasonable profit margin taking into account the fees that must be paid to complete the transaction and my cost on the items I sell. I know that some things will not sell and factor this in. It is not reasonable for you to expect me to sell something at a loss and I will not do so.

I also know that you could not buy this printer brand new in a factory sealed box with a warranty and a valid receipt from anywhere else at this price.

I seriously doubt that you would have the audacity to treat a retail establishment in such a manner and take offense at your tone.

I have at this point, placed you on my "blocked" list and will not sell anything to you under any circumstances.

Customer: u arent out of bussines man why you get mad? OFFER IS OFFER? YOU DONT OFFER? OR NOT? THIS IS AUCTION OR NOT I DONT MAKE ANY OFFENSE IF I GO TO THE WEBSITE - STORES I HAVE REAL WARRANTY? REMEMBER YOU ARE VIRTUAL N SMALL SELLER EPSON BIG SELLER THEY CAN HOLD WARRANTY 100% ANYWAYS I DONT BUY NOTGHING FROM YOU BYE.

So, there you have it. When I was young and naive, I thought the goal of every business should be to never have a dissatisfied customer. Now that I’m older, I’ve come to realize that there are some people that you can never satisfy and it would be a waste of time trying to do so.